i hate being cold.

ive come to the conclusion that you cant describe colors. its impossible. you can give a color a wavelength or suggest an object that takes on its shade, but neither would let someone see it in their minds if they have never seen it before. i think that makes colors special.

i want to write a book. but i dont know how. or what kind i would like to write. or why i want to write one. or where to start. or what i want to write about. these things are getting in my way. not to mention the factor of time. there arent enough hours in a day.

you know how people always say how wonderful the food is in other countries? i wonder if people from other countries like our food. or if they just think of it as less-good versions of their food. i think people dont like our food because we dont have our own signature type. but i wonder if american food really is as bad as people from other countries say it is. i think its just different. because i dont care what you say, arby's curly fries and wendy's junior bacon cheeseburgers and moe's quesadillas beat out all authentic food any day.

when im bored in class, i make schedules for my day. like this one i made for halloween:
5-5:45 eat
6-6:30 sleep
6:45-7 shower
7-9 study
9-9:45 get ready to leave
10-12 go out
it amuses me because i get out of class and forget about it. and then im going back through my notes and i see random schedules. and i dont remember what day they were for. but this one i remembered. i wasn't home until 1:30ish. seeing them makes me feel like i have a connection to something. and i have no idea why. i like it but sometimes it scares me and i dont know why.

sometimes i look at people when i pass them on my way to class. and i can imagine that if they were famous, people would think they were gorgeous. like they have intense blue eyes. or the perfect bone structure. or that messy-cute hair. but for now, people think theyre okay looking. i think that if i met a famous person that i think is gorgeous (aka johnny rzeznik) i wouldnt think he was so good-looking anymore. because i think the camera does it to you. ive never met someone who was drop-dead gorgeous like they are in the movies. ive seen beautiful people though.